I can’t believe in just a few short weeks our time together as ‘just us’ will be no longer. I am over the moon excited to meet your sister and I know you will be so amazing with her too, but there is a small part of me that is sad our time as ‘just us’ is over. You have been my little buddy for the past two years making every single day an adventure! You are such a beautiful soul and your spirit shines through in your smile. Strangers always tell us what a beautiful smile you have – we couldn’t agree more!! Perhaps it’s just that I’m your mom, but I think you are the most perfect little boy in the whole wide world. Even on the days you test mommy’s patience, there isn’t a second that I don’t love being your mommy.
Over the last two years together we have done a lot – You have made me realize I can love more then I ever thought possible, grow even when I didn’t think I needed to, and even gain a new understand of patience I never thought I had! But most of all, you have given me the gift of watching you grow into your own person. I used to dream about having a little boy and wonder what it would be like, but I could have never imagined it would be this much fun.. Your imagination is amazing, your words and stories are incredible and your soul that I see in your eyes brings me to tears to know Daddy and I created such a blessing for this world. If nothing else, I know I gave the world a gift the day you were born…
You are so excited to meet Molly. You tell everyone Molly is in mommy’s belly and you always want to show off her room. You tell me the bassinette is ‘Just Molly’ since we’ve had to tell you a few times not to climb in there! You are always so sweet when you see other babies – especially when they are upset. Your compassion for others is like none I’ve seen in a 2 year old before! Although you are so excited for her, I worry if you know what is really going to happen when she arrives. I know you will be just fine, but I also worry about the transitions as life as we know it is going to change. No more snuggles in bed with no rush on days without school – Mommy will have to tend to another little blessings needs as well – Will my time be split – will it be fair – will you understand? I have always wanted to give you a playmate – and I know what your life will be like as you grow up together. You will have many adventures, lots of giggles and too many stories to count! I loved growing up with an older brother and I know she will look up to you for so many things. I am comforted by the fact that you will show her the way and guide her the way we have guided you. You are such a loving little boy – I hope you always stay that way.
I wish I could bottle up these memories of two years and give them to you when you’re 25 – I know you probably won’t remember them and I bit of me is terrifield maybe I won’t either – but I know what you have taught me – and I won’t forget that. I will always think back to the days of ‘just us’ with a smile and a tear – a smile for the happiness it brought and a tear for how fast it went by.
So in these last few days/weeks before your sister arrives – I have found myself much more open to an extra treat – lots more snuggles – and of course a few extra books! I will savor every last day just the two of us regardless if you remember it or not.. I will do everything I can to keep it in my heart.
I know one day you will be a Daddy too – and maybe this will all make a little more sense then, but until then at least you can have this little note to ‘remember’ just how I felt on the days before your sister arrives.
Thank you – thank you – thank you for giving me two amazing, incredible, unbelievable years with you. You are my sunshine – you always will be. You are the reason I am here.
I love you with all my heart, Jackson David.